Support through Suffering

Today I received a distressing email from a very dear friend about her young son. Their names have been on the prayer list for a long time now, so that is a good thing. Her note made me want to jump on a plane to go out to see her, but that was just a wish. There's not much I can do about the situation, other than pray for her, and her family. I felt so powerless. The nagging feeling of being not in any control of the situation by any stretch of the imagination bogged me down all afternoon. On my way home from work, I pondered the facts and my hopes, wishes and feelings, and realized I just had to let go. It's not in my hands, I just have to trust that they will get through this (and they will). I can lend her moral support and a shoulder to cry on, but being a continent away, that's about all I can do. If we lived closer, I'm not sure what more I could do other than physically be there for her...
Why is it so very, very easy for most of us to get caught up in hoping to find the solution, so that suffering is minimized and life happily goes on when things get really complicated and painful? Who are we to take on that role of savior? Who are we to feel that we are all powerful and can fix it? I kept reminding myself that God brought them to this, God will get them through this. The only thing I can do is offer my heartfelt support. I thought that even if I had alot of money and could send it to them to cover the expenses, that could somehow change the balance of our friendship and what would I really be accomplishing? We are all given our burdens to get through, and as we make our way through them, over the bumps and twists and turns, we grow stronger, and our souls grow more refined.
It's not that I welcome struggle.... but I know there is treasure to be found deep inside the pain, once I can find my way to it.

Doorways

Endings and beginnings... doorways to the future and past. I'm not one to make "new year's resolutions" for I tend to pay more attention to things like the seasonal changes, or my birthday, as signposts for growth. However, any opportunity to stop and take stock of life is a good one. Standing in that doorway and looking back to see what you've learned and how you have matured is always helpful. Getting stuck there is not. But, take that in-between moment and savor it, because it is neither past nor future. The past is done, and you are greeting the future. Your future can be shaped by your past actions, certainly, but you also have the power to make other choices. To repair where it is needed, no matter how difficult a task that may be.... but, for this moment, on the cusp, just pause and enjoy the beauty of the present.
Open your heart to All That Is, and let the sensation and beauty of that wash over you. You are a perfect being, containing everything there ever was and will be.
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Vulnerability

My thoughts center around vulnerability. There are many times we have all felt at the bottom of the hole, at the end of our rope, believing that we have exhausted all the resources that we can think up, and we are left with no power or control. It is in that moment we feel the most vulnerable and lost, and the most in need of help. It is also hardest to reach out for help, for we feel completely disempowered and out of control. Even with a strong belief in Ha Shem or any higher power, somehow, we still aren't balanced, we are off-center.
In that most desperate of moments, if we can only remember that all of us have experienced something that has left us vulnerable, the most powerful thing we can do for ourselves is to reach out, however feebly and weakly may be our attempt, and that somehow, our small voice carries our pain into someone's heart who can reach out to help us. The most heroic thing one can do is reach out when one is in pain. At that point, rescue comes in every conceivable (and most times, inconceivable) ways.
Even in your most vulnerable, seemingly powerless state, you always have the power to reach out and say "I hurt, I need help" and allow your closed heart to open to the miracle that will most certainly come to you. Every closed door opens another door, and those passages are what makes us able to help others and further each other's growth. Take the gifts that come to you and use them to move out of the pain you are in.
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