Gematria-Hebrew Numerology

I love the study of Gematria. To those of you who are unfamiliar with it, each Hebrew letter is assigned a numerical value, and when words are composed, one can add up the values of the letters to come up with new words and meanings, as well as coming up with other words that have the same value. I have some nifty books, one of which is by Benjamin Blech called The Secrets of Hebrew Words (Jason Aronson 1996). My copy has a photo on the cover of a Torah scribe with long white beard, working diligently on his scroll.
The word that stood out for me today is "Soul" or Neshamah in Hebrew. On page 130, Mr. Blech asks: "Why must the soul be sent down to earth if, as tradition teaches us, Elohai neshamah she-natata bi tehorah hi, My God, the soul you have given me is pure (this is part of the blessing said when awakening in the morning). What need has it for the long journey of life before it returns to its source?"
When this is examined using Gematria, NeShaMaH is SheMoNaH, or the number 8. This number stands for the covenent of bris, circumcision, the partnership of God and humans. God created the world in seven days, and did as much as S/He would do, then left the rest for humanity to carry out. Through this specific effort, humans would EARN their place in eternity.
The effort entails studying God's will as transmitted through MiShNaH (Oral Law), and through the MiShNaH, NeShaMaH/soul will succeed in extending God's 7 days of creation through SheMoNaH and beyond.
Quite clever, don't you think?!
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Hineni, Sh'viti

There are 2 Hebrew words that guide my life: Hineni and Sh'viti.
Hineni means Here am I. It's what Abraham said to God when he was preparing to offer his only son Isaac as a sacrifice as a test of his pure faith in HaShem. Hineni implies that you and HaShem are united as a force.... no expectations, no ego, be-ing in the present moment in the exact place and time you are. I say that word to myself often during the day, especially when I find myself drifting and not focusing on where I am. If you are lucky enough to remember your dreams, think about the state you are in while in a dream--you are completely focused on what is happening at the moment. What if you could live your life as you do in a dream? Completely focused, letting things unfold, taking action where appropriate, being in the flow. In the Here and Now.

Sh'viti means I put God always before me. The verse "Sh'viti Hashem l'negdi tamid" means I put Hashem in the forefront of my mind. There is a kind of mandala used by Kaballists that is meditated upon to put one in that frame of mind, to put one in the compassionate mode, if you will. Both of these words go together in my mind (and heart) because when I put God before me, I am in the present moment, coming into living with a compassionate heart for my self and others.

Saying Yes to Ayin

I met alot of stressed out people this week, rushing around, multi-tasking, looking grim-faced and pressured. Is that what our lives are about? I understand people have much on their plates, maybe too much, and perhaps some re-ordering of priorities would help. It's powerful to say NO! It seems more difficult to say NO than to say YES. If I'm ambivalent about my commitment, I tell the person I have to get back to them by a certain time (usually 24 hours).

If you are feeling stressed out, here is a wonderful meditation/breathing exercise that can relieve the stress on your body, mind, and spirit. I call it the "Ayin" breath. Ayin is the 16th letter of the Hebrew alef-bet, a vowel that looks like the letter Y, and is pronounced "ah-yeen" and if it sounds like the word "eye" that is also what it means. When you practice the Ayin breath, because Ayin is a vowel that has no sound, you will notice it is only a breath. What I like about the Ayin meditation is I take the meaning of Ayin, or eye, and after I have meditated, it helps me look at my life with "real eyes" and realize what is true for me, and what is not. It helps me know when to say No or Yes to things.

Sit comfortably and breathe normally, inhaling and exhaling through your nose. Just pay attention to the inhalation and exhalation, feeling the air coming in through your nose and into your body, exhaling any stress you may feel. Do this for a few minutes.

As you are attending to your breath, ask yourself where the breath is coming from....
who is really doing the breathing.....
who is "I'.....
keep asking "who is this "I" who is breathing?
feeling ever more empty and free....
emptying yourself of stress....
opening your heart to HaShem....
the Ayin of the breath.........
energy of the universe coming into you through your breath......
breathing in the energy of ALL......
emptying yourself.........Ayin..........

Tolerance & Suffering

Those of you who have been part of the group for awhile know that I enjoy "playing" with Hebrew words. I often find inspiration and meaning when the letters are rearranged to give me other words that relate to my chosen word. This week I decided to consider the word for patience, since that is a quality I have been struggling with of late. In Hebrew, the word is "savlanut" which is derived from "savlun" (long-suffering) and "sevel" (burden/pain). The root word is made from the letters samekh, bet and lamed. The word for patience means the ability to endure a load or burden. In addition, changing the first vowel to make the word sovlanut, reforms the word into tolerance. So, not only am I "suffering" and dealing with all that goes along with that, but it seems that I need to open my heart to the tolerance of that suffering. I need to make room for that huge uncomfortable burden! What must I do to tolerate that which is already unpleasant? Such is the beauty of the language of the Torah!

We each have our way of tolerating the load we are carrying. I journal and meditate. Sometimes I drum/rattle away the excess energy that seems to get in the way of what really is bothering me so I can get to the meat of the matter. Talking helps to unburden my heart as well. Exercise also helps. There are many ways to not only make room for the burden, but to help see it more clearly, and to understand what is being asked of us in the carrying of this burden at this time in our lives.